The cave we fear to enter 🏴☠️ holds the treasure 👑 we seek
Prepping for the launch of A Crisis Is a Terrible Thing to Waste, I girded my loins and called in the cavalry of my dearest friends, asking them to help me.
Because I was birthing to BIG BERTHA, herself, I needed multiple midwives to help quell my anxiety, calm my heart palpitations, and pull me back from the cliff of disassociation.
I was terrified that if people knew my secrets, read my shame stories, saw the flaws of my life behind the scenes, they would run for the hills, excommunicate me, burn me at the stake, drop me off a cliff and leave me for dead...or all of the above, if that’s even possible.
So why in God's name did I write this, much less put it out in the world?
A few years ago, on New Year's Day, I was walking through the canyon by my house, asking God/the Universe, “Of all the topics I could write about, what would be the most useful?”
Just then I heard the voice of God (or maybe it was Aspen Matis, my writing mentor) thunder:
“If somebody else can write that book, let them.
Write the book that only you can.”
I stopped in my tracks, in a plume of dust, surrounded by red rocks, birds and squirrels in mid-flutter, tears streaking my face, knowing this was the book I had to write. This is the only book I could write that no one else could.
When I made it back home from that fateful hike, with shaky hands, sputtery tears, snotty sniffles, and anxiety-infused hot flashes, I began writing that book. And now, years later, here she is, Big Bertha is out of my writer's womb, and in the world!
And here’s what I have to report…the craziest thing is happening.
As we speak, instead of people throwing me away like I feared they would, they are letting me into the deeper chambers of their hearts. In fact, I've never had such positive feedback from people, strangers, and the media about any book I've written over the last 20 years, and it's blowing my mind!!!
It's as if, because people know my secrets, they are entrusting me with theirs.
It makes me cry just thinking about what a profound honor this is.
It's true what they say in 12-Step Programs, “We are as sick as our secrets.”
Having shared mine, lo and behold, I feel less sick. And I'm inviting you to join me.
Ok, before we all start hurling all over each other, I think it's valid to consider the wisdom of Brene Brown who said:
“People have to earn the right to hear your shame.”
True.
Telling the truth can be risky business, especially to those who haven't yet embraced their own shame…but I believe it's riskier to bury it inside.
So, what do we do with this conundrum?
This is where dreams come to the rescue.
From a dream perspective there is no they, them, or even you.
According to the late great Carl Jung, everyone and everything in our dream is an aspect of ourselves. And this is also true for our waking dream... because we are dreaming all the time.
To the degree to which we love, accept and embrace ourselves (flaws, boogers, cellulite and all) is the degree to which can be at peace no matter what the "world outside" may say.
And to the degree to which we refuse to love, accept and embrace ourselves is the degree to which we will suffer; no matter how much we achieve and seek to prove our worthiness, it’s an inside job!
And, as Joseph Campbell said:
“The cave we fear to enter holds the treasures we seek.”
Writing this book and putting it out there has been an experiment in tip-toe-ing into that cave...
And...not to be braggadocios, but to inspire you to consider that what you thought was the worst thing about you, might, in fact, be the best thing, in disguise.
To encourage you to share your secrets to a sacred someone, I want to tell you that, as a result of me pulling back the curtain on my biggest missteps, misfortunes and mistakes...
I've had more positive response for this book I ever have with any other. Here's a few exciting things I hope will inspire you...
Here's a clip from New York Living: Surviving Nightmares--don't worry--I had PLENTY of COFFEE before this interview (ha ha) maybe too much!
